2 grand daddies

stinks and i got a real treat this weekend: we got to spend father’s day (and the whole week) with my dad, aka lu’s pop pop. i know i’m a sap and overly hormonal these days, but i think i tears welled up at least 27 effing times…

pop pop, you have a big f*cking nose!

since my parents live across the country, we don’t see them much…which makes me feel really guilty (gee thanks, catholicism). in fact, almost 2 years ago, puddn and i rushed to get married in my parents’ backyard (yep, lu was totally illegit) cuz we weren’t sure how much longer my sick dad was gonna stick around.

well cut to last monday night…that 83-year-old padre watched “the bachelorette” with me and stinks, clearly still alive ‘n’ kickin’. for a guy who falls asleep every time the tv’s on (except during “everybody loves raymond” ruruns, duh), he stayed wide awake for the whole freakin’ show—and seemed to know a lot about what was going on:

about emily:  “well she sure is somethin’, isn’t she?”

about jef, as he was sucking face with emily:  “well i’ll betcha HE gets a rose tonight.”

about sean:  “she must’ve given him a rose cuz he has a good personality…cuz he sure isn’t good-lookin’.”

but the highlight of the week was watching stinks with pop pop. it’s kinda bizarre how much she just adores him. and he’s pretty crazy about her, too…well, for the most part. when we first got there he said, “i’m glad she’s your baby cuz she doesn’t listen for nothin’.” but in his defense, he was kinda right…the lil brat really doesn’t listen “for nothin’.”

and sometimes he mistakenly calls her “lucy” or worse yet, thinks she’s a boy, but mostly pop pop calls her “my lulubelle.”  it’s effing adorable and i gotta say it makes my heart hurt a little.

it’s true love alright…i mean, stinks doesn’t even give a sh*t when pop pop puts his teeth in right in front of her. um, ew. and she doesn’t flinch to hold his hideously gnarled, arthritic hands. i know, poor guy. hell, he doesn’t really even get out of his wheelchair. but lu doesn’t give a rat’s ass. in fact, she pushes him around in it and hugs his legs…god, i f*cking love that kid.

and then…puddn totally surprised stinks and met us for the weekend. since it’s father’s day, i guess i’ll be nice and won’t call him a dipsh*t or a deadbeat for once.

actually, i decided to be really freakin’ nice this year (lord knows why)—lu and i had puddn’s stupid, f*cking “big lebowski” poster custom matted and framed. yep, i completely caved and gave in to the dude. i don’t wanna talk about it…or the $154 i coughed up for that bullsh*t. at least land’s end was having a sale on those no-wrinkle shirts puddn likes.

all in all, it was a great father’s day. and you know what? i’ll give anything for an exact repeat next year…well, minus lebowski.

hey, old man, how 'bout giving up some of that cookie on your plate?
wtf?!? why isn't my cuteness working on this geezer?
hope you don't mind taking a long walk off a short pier, buddy.
oh wait, scratch that..."ellen" is starting...i hope those british chicks are on again!
ugh, these 2 are always stealing the limelight from me.
beat it, lukey! this is my pic.
oh great, now nonna's gotta ruin it.
and now my mom's tits have to steal the show...typical.
smile, pop pop! it's just me and you!
ugh, i hope emily ditches that idiot, ryan.
pop pop, i'd give you a rose.
check out the awesome card i picked out for you!
man, i didn't realize it was so corny.
yaaay! look who's here!
um, what the f*ck are we supposed to be looking at?
and peeps say i look like this dude...woof, i hope not.
here's where my parents got married...when they decided they didn't want me to be a bastard anymore.
anybody else notice my mom's getting kinda chunky?
come on! that fat-ass will never keep up!
ew, daddy, your breath stinks.
happy father's day, y'all!

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This entry was posted in big lebowski, curse words, cursing baby, f bombs, first-time mom, frat dude, grandparents, husband, i love you, in-laws, male body hair, neurotic mom, new father, pregnancy, pregnant at 40, shopping, the bachelor, toddler who curses, Uncategorized, vacation, wedding and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to 2 grand daddies

  1. delighted kate says:

    so f***ing cute! and i’m jealous of Lu’s jelly shoes.

  2. Amanda says:

    But the important question is…who does Lu choose for Emily?

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